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I destroyed my life. Where do I go from here?

Article about: I'm sorry to post this here but I have no one else to go to. I don't know what to do anymore. My money is finally drying up and I'm going broke. All my "friends" left me when they

  1. #21


    I think you've already gotten excellent advice. There's little I can add that isn't already said. I will say, guess how many of my high school friends I still would consider close in my life? None. Then guess how many of my college friends I would consider close in my life? None. And, I went on to start a career and made new friends. Life is full of phases, like it or not, ready or not, and each one offers a chance to start anew in some way.

    If I knew how little things at your age (other than education) really mattered, I would have relaxed a hell of lot more than I did, and enjoy it. I don't mean that to sound condescending. I was told similar things when I was your age, and the advice seemed cheap to me then because everything felt immensely important in the context of that moment. But, age will give you a certain perspective, and with that a certain nostalgia. And, the things you'll come to regret is the times you let yourself be overwhelmed by things that were not that important in the long and grand scheme of things, which caused you to miss an opportunity to experience something.

    One of my Facebook friends lost her 3 year old son to a rare childhood cancer a couple years back. Just a bad roll of the dice, something went wrong in his body, and he's gone. Died in her arms one night. Every single day she posts something about missing him. A friend of mine from high school just lost her husband to a 2 year battle with a brain tumor. They have 8 kids, and she was a stay at home mom and has no job as he was the breadwinner. I have photos on my timeline of her saying goodbye to him at the hospital as their 3 year old boy watches from the nearby hospital bed. He probably won't remember his daddy. Three of their kids were his from a previous marriage, and the family sued for custody and has taken them back from her breaking up her family. A doctor once told me "Don't sweat the small stuff. Everything outside the body is small stuff." There's a lot of truth to that.

    Salvage the relationship with that girl, she sounds like she's after what's best for you, and just go a day at a time from there. Before you know it, something else will present itself and you'll be off on another one of those phases I talked about. It may seem like the end of the world right now, but one day you'll look back on this and see it's just one page in a much larger book. You just need to write a few more chapters to see it.

    Good luck, and chin up. You're going to be fine come what may.
    "Only a real risk tests the reality of a belief." - C.S. Lewis

  2. #22


    Just for you to know, most of us here aint rich. Most of us here fight our own demons. When humans are in a stressed sitaution, it is always easiest to hide under the bed or in drugs&booze, and hope tomorrow will be better- Well it wont unless YOU do something about it.

    I have zero "friends", i dont need it- why should i have such a thing as that? Idont understand why people need to be loved or surronded by others. Humbug,- I am living alone in a bamboo shack in the mountains in Philippines getting a weak internet signal from an antenna. I decided along time ago to be strong. I dont allow myself to be a weak little sissy.
    What you need Sir, is a goal. You need something to get your spirit back on track. Jebus or allah or drugs and so on will NOT help you- your willpower and your strenght will help you, if you allow yourself to help you.

    Ask yourself what you want to do, ask yourself what you can do, what skills you have and so on. The good thing is that you are young, you have plenty of time to decide what you want to do with your life- but one thing i can tell you out of experience: Drugs and booze turns you into a weak little cunt. So ask yourself, do you really want to be weak??!

    I am maybe a tad sociopathic, but i am telling you these words in the best meaning.

    If i were young today, i would have taken all the classes in welding i could find, every mechanical education i could find- then i would open my own shop and be well of today- instead i choosed the way of the gun and lost my health.

    Choose wisely young Sir, Listen to the advices you have been given.
    Collect ROA, Cossack, Schuma and other WW2 Volunteer militaria.

    "Be Humble and kind, for you may find that it was Odin you entertained"

  3. #23


    TrondK wanted to kick me once! take on his words!

  4. #24


    Quote by reneblacky View Post
    TrondK wanted to kick me once! take on his words!
    Well, yeah sorry about that. I choose to blame the government
    Collect ROA, Cossack, Schuma and other WW2 Volunteer militaria.

    "Be Humble and kind, for you may find that it was Odin you entertained"

  5. #25


    Some very good points for you to note, now lets face the hard facts of life. You are 17yrs old, you have said that you were a millionaire. At that age with that amount of money, you have done what most people do at a young age who have money to burn,abuse it. You have treated the world as your own personal playground, which now you are finding it to the contrary. Life is what you make it, its just a shame that money has been the root of your trouble, you,ve had unparalled access to booze, drugs ,high living, and with that comes a large amount of hangers on who you thought were your friends, they have seen fit to desert you in your time of need, most of us can count on one hand who our true friends are. At this stage you are in a depression which you have dealt with by continuing to drink and abuse yourself with drugs, which only causes more deep depression, its a viscious circle and one that you have to break, no-one can help you do this, you can listen to all the advises in the world, but if your not prepared to look up instead of down, then you will remain in a state of self pity. Personally i would say you first need to talk with this young girl who saw fit to support you, forget all those other so called friends, you only need one, someone who is willing to face your recovery with you. Running away does,nt help you, you will only feel exactly the same somewhere else, and the temptations will still be there but no friend to turn to. If you have to, get yourself into a programme where others like you can guide you, nothing else matters except getting your head straight and sober. I.m not going to tell you it will be easy, its going to be damn hard, there may be setbacks, but if you can be strong you will beat it and life will start to look a whole lot better. You are too young to be like this, start to live life to the full without the trappings of money, money comes to those that earn it and respect it . Theres an old saying "money is the root of all evil", I dont agree, Temptation is and if you can avoid that then you can begin a new chapter in your life, good luck and take each day as it comes, but look up, never down.

  6. #26


    in the worst of times i always picture the sorrow & hardship of war,.what the soldiers went through in the freezing -30 degrees of winter,.civiians losing whole families,.people surviving through the hardest of hardships,.like the bombing of dresden or the london blitz.
    what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger.when i hold my steel helmets i think to myself,..who owned this,what did he overcome in his life.
    you only get one shot at life,.& not trying is tenfold worse than failure.keep your head up brother.

  7. #27


    All great advice..and now is the time to start sifting through the rubble..take what is salvageable or cut your losses and start over. Sometimes these circumstances need to happen to strengthen us for a future time. The choice is yours to make this happen as said by all those above. No one can do this except you.

    There is no over night fix to lifes disasters ...and will take time..sometimes years. Fact!
    Stand up and start walking to make the necessary changes have support here with those who had commented..and hopefully off the forum as well. You have to make this happen.

    When one door is closed which is happening now..another opens which you have to step through. Change your life course now or you will never get out from where you are sitting at the bottom . The hands who have reached down to you..know the way out..because they themselves have been down in that same hole as you.

    The time is now. Best Wishes Larry
    It is not the size of a Collection in History that matters......Its the size of your Passion for it!! - Larry C

    One never knows what tree roots push to the surface of what laid buried before the tree was planted - Larry C

    “The farther back you can look, the farther forward you are likely to see.” - Winston Churchill

  8. #28


    I dont have anything more to add,everybody has contributed to this thread with great experience and i only wish i had all this advice when i was your age too! Money doesnt make the man!. I lost my way at 16 to drugs and alcohol also,took me decades to realise i didnt want or need them to feel happy anymore. I have 1 friend from my childhood i keep in touch with,i dont need anymore "so called" friends,1 good friend is worth more than a "bunch" of them! Please dont give up mate,it will happen in due course,next thing you know you'll be reading this in the future and thinking "i cant believe i wrote that"! Well,thats my tuppence worth..take it easy,thing will change for the us all! Mark

  9. #29


    Chrisk there is nothing here that I can add to that has not been spoken other than the fact I have been down this road in my younger years and I was much older than 17 when I realized wear my path had taken me...
    You can change but as stated it will not be easy to overcome and there may be set backs along the way .
    Never give up once you start to move forward there is light at the end but at times it will seem far off and away but with the passing of time it will get easier look close at the people around you if they offer support and are a positive influence on you and your new life choice they may be worth while keeping as friends all others should be left at the side of the road while you carry on with your new journey.

    Regards Mark
    Always on the look out for WW II Canadian Helmets and Cam nets to add to my collection.

    Found a Canadian Mk II Medics Helmet and yes I know they are about as rare as hens teeth !!!!!

  10. #30


    I think you have been given great advice and this thread is going no where except repeating the same advice. We all hope you work out your problems as the solution is in your hands. This thread is now closed.


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